H. U. G. , not shrug

(…and your dad, too)
Keep Calm posters from Pinterest

 

 

Hug now, while you can. This 2001 “Group Hug” was before my dad’s Alzheimer’s and my mom’s dementia.

I smiled as I read the banner that floated outside the children’s center: hugs Help You Giggle    Below that was this message:  Help Someone Giggle On June 29th ~ Give Hugs, Not Shrugs

This Wednesday is “Hug Holiday: Give Hugs to Those Who Need Them”    The truth is, we all need a little help sometimes.   On June 29^th, be generous with your hugs, or if you’re not big on hugging, then reach out with a smile.   Little acts of kindness can make a big difference.

If a picture is really worth a thousand words, then this week’s brief post is actually 4,000 words. The message: Read Less, Hug More.

When in doubt at dress-up occasions, give a hug.

 

Scout is growing up, but she’s still our hugging puppy, and this makes us very happy.

 

When someone is nervous and really hoping for something, cross your fingers, touch hands, and hope together.

 

 

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A CLUB YOU DO NOT WANT TO JOIN

Molly wishes her grandmother a happy birthday.

    

Molly brightened the room by making a birthday wall wreath of flip-flops.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

At the Friday evening dinner, Maggie and my mom were a great team; Maggie slept through most of the fun beside Mom’s recliner.

 

 

 

 

 

 

We celebrated my mother’s 97^th birthday last week. It was almost a month early, but this was the only time when her children and spouses, grandchildren and great-grandchildren could all get together. Especially her youngest grandchild, who flew all the way from China for the reunion and was swamped with hugs.

It was a wonderful combination of family, food, and fun, but the early-birthday girl slept though almost all of it. She sometimes smiled at the flowers, cards, hugs and kisses, but she didn’t realize who we were or what was happening. That’s how it is with her advanced dementia—and how it was with my dad’s Alzheimer’s–but we still do the best we can to celebrate our parents’ lives and show our love.

June is ALZHEIMER’S & BRAIN AWARENESS MONTH. More than 5 million Americans are living with Alzheimer’s, and a similar population percentage is found in countries all over the world. Alzheimer’s is a non-exclusive club that is open to everyone, and it charges very high dues.

Here are the latest research suggestions to promote brain health and prevent or postpone Alzheimer’s. Basically, heart healthy and brain healthy guidelines are very compatible:

~ the more you eat of the richer, deeper colors of vegetables and fresh fruits (especially berries), the better; ~ limit the amount of meats and processed meats you eat; ~ do NOT smoke; ~ monitor and control your blood pressure and cholesterol; ~ walk daily and/or exercise for 30 min. 3-4 times a week; ~ participate in games, classes, and activities with others; ~ brush and floss daily, and see a dentist regularly. 1-2 cups of morning coffee each day is still a plus against Alzheimer’s, but isn’t specifically listed for heart health.

My parents lived by everything on the list above—except the coffee; they drank tea—but Dad still died of Alzheimer’s at 89, and Mom’s symptoms began when she was 91. There are certainly other variables to be identified and studied, but for overall health the suggestions above—especially eating healthy foods—are a good start.

I read this advice on a poster with a picture of a huge garden with children picking baskets of vegetables: When it comes to food and labels of ingredients, here’s the plan: If you can’t pronounce it, do not eat it.   And I think Doug Larson was both correct and funny (humor is good medicine, after all) when he wrote, “Life expectancy would grow by leaps and bounds if green vegetables smelled as good as bacon.”

Here’s to fun, family, friends, and food (especially if it smells like bacon)…and doing our best to stay out of the Alzheimer’s Club.

Her great-grandchildren made a 2’x3′ poster board card for her living room.

Flowers for Mom’s early 97th birthday celebration.

NON-TRADITIONAL CREATIVITY

 

 

Closeup of the chair feet, in Keene walking sandals and hiking boots.

Giving special gifts on specific anniversaries isn’t a new concept. It dates back to the Middle Ages, where underlying superstitions and beliefs corresponded with giving gifts to welcome good luck or ward off the bad.

When my brother once asked our dad what was the best decision he ever made, Dad said, “I married your mother.” Our parents were married for sixty-four years before his Alzheimer’s and her dementia set in, and their anniversary celebrations were usually low key and private. They enjoyed going out for dinner, usually with family, and holding hands as they read their anniversary cards and talked about favorite memories.

This summer Jim and I celebrate our 30^th anniversary, and traditionally the gift for the 30^th is the pearl. Our daughter—a wonderful independently creative gift maker—gave us a unique set of anniversary chairs this year. Full-heart, headless chairs.

Last year she painted Picasso-type art chairs with Picasso quotes for us.

This year’s chairs wear tee-shirts, jeans, Keene walking sandals (for me) and hiking boots (for Jim), and are stuffed with multiple pillows that make these the most comfortable, form-fitting chairs ever.

For us, it’s not expensive gifts, fancy dinners out or celebrations that make an anniversary special. It’s being with each other and the family we love dearly, seeing their smiling faces around the table, and hearing everyone share favorite memories. Like my parents, we would title these celebrations by borrowing another title: “It’s A Wonderful Life.”

Tucked among greeting card-type romantic verses, we’ve found a sentiment by writer and comedian Rita Rudner that makes us laugh. “It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.”   And a favorite toast for weddings and anniversaries is by sci-fi writer Robert Heinlein: “May you live as long as you wish and love as long as you live.”

Today our hearts are full, grateful for love, marriage, family, friends, and wonderful dads. And anniversaries with traditional pearls or non-traditional headless chairs.

 

 

 

DOUBLE DOG DARE

Excuse me…double dog dare? Really?  I don’t think so.  Sounds like a dare a cat would make.   (Pictures by Marylin Warner)

JUNE: the Ancient Romans named this month after the goddess Juno, the patron of marriage—think “June bride”—and June also comes from the Latin word “juvenio” (referring to young people). Juvenile is an excellent way to see the special day of June 1^st: DARE DAY.    Not D.A.R.E., the Drug Abuse Resistance Education for students, and also not the first Saturday in June when Dare County, England celebrates its Dare Day.

June 1^st DARE DAY is for daring someone to do something risky.   The dare can be heightened by the “double dog dare,” and the highest degree of challenge is the “triple dog dare.”   Whatever that means. The specific rules and consequences are up for grabs, embellished for effect, but often the outcome is dangerous or out-of-character behavior. Which is a good reason why the goddess Juno was also responsible for looking after the well being of women and girls…who might be “dared” to do things they don’t want to do.

When I was growing up, one of the things that got my mother quickly involved was to hear children “dare” another child to do something.   Mom equated dares with the acts of bullies and cowards who prodded others to do something against their best interests.   I remember one day when she overrode a double dog dare by sending me to my room to sort out WHY I had thought making such a challenge was a helpful thing to do to anyone.

At its personal best, DARE DAY on June 1st can be a day to challenge yourself to take a risk, meet a goal, or make yourself do something you’ve been meaning to do but keep putting off.

Michael Jackson wrote this about taking dares: “In a world filled with hate, we must still dare to hope. In a world filled with anger, we must still dare to comfort. In a world filled with despair, we must still dare to dream. And in a world filled with distrust, we must still dare to believe.”

On June 1^st, if we have no personal challenges or dares to give ourselves, we can choose one from Jackson’s list above. Or we can send ourselves to our rooms to think quietly until we create our own personal and positive dare.

Who would dare a kid to try to push over a huge boulder in Colorado’s Garden of the Gods?

What if someone triple dog dared you to pierce your eyebrow?

Celebrate LEON Day, U.F.O.s, and Super Strength

 

Our dog Maggie in reindeer antlers, the perfect attire for celebrating LEON Day. (All pictures by Marylin Warner)

Making S’mores, a perfect way to celebrate Camping Month AND the First Day of summer!

 

Toothbrushes (invented in 1498) are the best way to clean teeth after S’mores.

Not to put too much emphasis on last week’s book titles containing the word POO, but did you know that June is Potty Training Awareness Month? (Just pointing out a theme connection.) Now, moving along to new topics…

June is CAMPING MONTH, GREAT OUTDOORS MONTH, and ICE TEA MONTH. It all fits together as this Saturday, June 21, is officially the FIRST DAY OF SUMMER. Tuesday, June 24, is U.F. O. Day if you want to dig out old Roswell videos or watch the INDEPENDENCE DAY movie. And if you grill out and chomp down on picnic foods as you discuss U.F.O. sightings, it’s a good thing that the next day, June 25, is the anniversary of the day the toothbrush was invented (in 1498).

June 25 is also LEON Day. If you were born on June 25, your sign is LEO, but that’s not the same as LEON Day. LEON is NOEL spelled backwards, and June 25 is six months until Christmas. If you want to celebrate an early half-way-to-Christmas party and share the holiday spirit, next Wednesday is your day.

June 30 is the birthday of the Superman Action Comic Cover (1938), although the birthday of Clark Kent is debated as being either June 18 or February 20. Feel free to celebrate all three dates by protecting the innocent and fighting bad guys.

Christopher Reeve, who played the modern role of the Superman superhero, became a quadriplegic after being thrown from a horse. He lobbied on behalf of people with spinal- cord injuries until his death at the age of 52.

Reeve once described the superhero role this way:   “What makes Superman a hero is not that he has power, but that he has the wisdom and maturity to use the power wisely…”

With all that’s happening throughout the world, we’re in need of true heroes right now, those who have power but also the wisdom and maturity to use the power wisely.

There are many special June days to enjoy next week. If you want to celebrate the qualities Christopher Reeve saw in Superman, here’s a recipe for cookies to munch on as you consider all the qualities of true heroes.  This recipe originally came from the book SUPERMAN, SERIAL TO CEREAL by Gary Grossman.   ENJOY!

Superman Cookies

~ Cream ¼ lb. butter together with ½ c. sugar and blend in 1 beaten egg

~ Blend in 1 ½ c. flour, ½ c. at a time

~ Add ½ t. baking soda dissolved in a tablespoon of hot water

~ Add ½ c. coarsely grated sweet chocolate (or ½ c. choc. chips) and 1 c. corn flakes

~ Drop by teaspoon on greased cookie sheet and bake at 375 degrees for 10-12 min.

Drink a glass of milk and eat your cookies; flex your muscles and vow to be strong, powerful…and wise!

The cover of Christopher Reeve’s book,   STILL ME.